10 Creepy Things I've Done in My Life

Most of you know my alter-ego, Creepy Sabba. Here are some things she's done.

1. Followed a car off the freeway to tell him I like his license plate. It said Jedi Knight. To be fair, he was going home the same way as me. I just didn't need to follow him to that one dead end street.

2. Stalked Chris Pine. Went to the coffee shop he always goes to; he happened to be there. Went to the stage door of the play he was in, without seeing the play, and stole playbills to make us look legit. Went back to coffee place later and found his apartment.

3. Asked Hank Azaria for a hug. This one is interesting because my asking for a hug wasn't creepy, in my opinion, but his response of "You're needy," made it creepier. But it's cool. I got a hug.

4. Followed a guy out of the dining commons to find out where he lived. Left my meal unfinished.

5. Facebook stalked pictures of the ex-girlfriend of the guy I liked. Looked at every single one of her pictures. Even looked at pictures of other people by just looking through albums she was tagged in.

6. Made my friends wait an extra 20 minutes in the dining commons and exit the round about way so I could find out this guys name. He was wearing a Star Wars t-shirt. We'd chatted about it. Didn't find out his name.

7. Grabbed my friend Kiarash's crotch. Just wanted to make sure he had something there. Plus someone double dog dared me to do it.

8. Took a picture with a random guy outside Ben & Jerry's. He was cute. Had to run and stop him to take picture. Look in my facebook profile pics. It's there.

9. Went into the dining commons after this guy so I could find out his last name and facebook stalk him. It was successful. Even got a picture on my camera phone that day.

10. Told the internet I was engaged to Kevin Jonas. Put it in our IMDb trivia. I got a facebook message from some girl and convinced her. Other girls were mad. There is a still a group of girls out there somewhere who think we were engaged, for the briefest moment, until he married someone else.

Creepy Sabba needs to take a rest now.

My Life in Constant Pain

My left, lower back, bottom wisdom tooth started bothering me on Thursday, 12/31/09. It is now Tuesday, 1/5/10, and it still bothering me.

I can't chew on my left side. Have you ever tried eating using only one side of your mouth? It gets tiring very quickly. Sometimes I need to take a break during the meal times.

I also can't smile without it hurting. I constantly look angry. Which isn't actually that far from the truth since I'm constantly in fucking pain.

The gum around my wisdom tooth has swollen, and possibly has an infection. This is what I think I have- pericoronitis. Seeing a doctor again tomorrow, so we'll see what he says. You'll never guess how I found this doctor. 1-800-DENTIST. I know!

I'm also taking inappropriate amounts of ibuprofen. 800mg here, another 800mg there. Perhaps later this evening I'll even pop a vicodin. That should be fun. I popped one last night. Everything got really big in my mind. I woke up at 5 am in intense pain, however, I didn't want to take another vicodin, and for ibuprofen to not make me sick, I have to eat something before. I wasn't about to eat at 5 am. My bed was so warm.

You know what Yoda should have told little Anakin? PAIN leads to anger. Anger leads to hatred. I hate so many people right now. People I generally really like. I blame my tooth.

So please, if it seems like I hate you, I probably do. But I'll try and not hate you when I'm not in pain. Except for that one bitch. That one bitch can totally suck it.

An Evening with the Persian Jews

Every year since my birth my grandparents have thrown a big ass New Years Party at their home. And every year, I've watched as the guests who were once so young(ish), excitable, and vibrant get older, older, and lamer.

Last night as we put on all sorts of fun music for them to dance to, they continued to sit there, as they often do, and I seemed to become the source of entertainment. I was there, on the dance floor, the latest girl of the marrying age, and I could feel everyone watching me--deciding if I was worthy of their sons or grandsons. I got pulled over to them a lot. Mostly to hear, "Sabba Joon, you look so much better now." Was I ugly before? Or, "Sabba? Is that you? My god! Are you going to law school?" Imagine all of their pretending-to-be-happy faces when I explained that I go to Davis and am majoring in Film and Theatre.

People I didn't know also kept taking pictures of me. I expect that those pictures will be show around their family and my parents will soon get the "Hey! You've got a daughter! I've got a son! Let's make them date!" conversation. It should be amusing.